There are times in the Bible where people would come to Jesus and they would ask Him to cure someone and they would say "if you are willing..." and Jesus' response was "I am willing" the reaction in that case is a joyful one, but there is a question that arises.
What would we do if His answer was "I am not willing" ?
1. React violently, in a sense we lose our trust and hope in God. Even though He may have done many things that proved His love on a daily level.
2. Thank Him for through His mysterious wisdom we know that He is just and kind. When He refuses our request as it is requested it is not because He doesn't love us, for everything He does is through love. It is because to move on to the next spiritual course we must go through the training and the conditioning. When an athlete is faced with a challenge he/she doesn't give up but continues to callenge himself to the fullest extent.
When God says "I am not willing" we should know that it is the time where we will spiritually Handle more. During this time we move from being able to lift a 100 pounds to 150. We age says I am not willing, He is not saying I don't love you. For as He tells Saint Faustina " if my death on the course doesn't prove to you that I love you, what will?" His love is never to be doubted.
Yes, I expect Him to heal those I bring to Him the way I want because I have faith that He can. But because I have faith in Him, I must also have faith in His time and His methodology. There were mAny blind people that Jesus healed, but each with a different method. So He said open and they opened . To others he took mud and spit and put it on their eyes and still to others He lead them away and them opened their eyes.
So the good Lord, has His methodology. He knows that the time of healing needed for this person and everyone around them.
"I am not willing" sometimes is the best form of healing. Jesus isn't just interested in healing the body, He is far more concerned with healing the soul. Not just the soul of the person asking for Healing, but for everyone that person encounter. Primarily their family. The spiritual healing, will become a stronger testimony than that of the physical. For example the 10 people with leprosy, only one came back glorifying God and thanking Jesus. He received spiritual healing and this healing was transferred to everyone around them. Their live was transformed not by their physical healing, although that was the start off point, but when they recognized the hand of God.
Very often we look at the crosses before us and say what Peter said to Jesus "God forbid" but Jesus knowing the value of the cross for humanity did not view it as a punishment as Peter did, but rather rebuked Peter saying, "depart from me satan". The cross is not a punishment, it is a gift that holds a value that resonates beyond, the self to the society.
yet the hope remains that answer will be "I will" rather than the not, and even if time passes our hope will remain the same,for knows the timing as He knew with Lazarus. He waited after He heard their cries until the time was right so instead of healing He may raise him from the dead. So, we too hope for same thing from the one who is capable. Lord I have faith, heal us.
What if the answer is not " I am not willing " in the first place? What if the answer is " I am willing, but not the way you except?" We must not place the infinite within the limits of the finite, In this case we would be replacing the capacity of the creator with that of the created, of which we will reach the extremities of errors for the creation will never meet up to the level of the creator.